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Mental Wellness: Understanding Impulse Control Disorders

Mental Wellness: Understanding Impulse Control Disorders

Meluleki Ncube, Kate Motaung2026-05-14T06:26:56+00:00May 14th, 2026|Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues|

Impulse control disorders (ICDs) are a type of mental health disorder that is characterized by the inability to control certain impulses. These impulses can be aggressive and antisocial. Typically, individuals who struggle with ICD cannot overcome the impulse to engage in harmful, destructive, or disruptive manners. Understanding impulse control disorders is the first step toward better mental wellness. There are multiple categories of impulse control disorders as well as different symptoms. ICD usually appears in childhood, but there are rare occasions that it doesn’t manifest until adulthood. The causes of impulse control disorder are just as varied as the symptoms, depending on the person. ICDs can affect mental wellness to various degrees. No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it. – 1 Corinthians 10:13, ESV Types of impulse control disorders and symptoms It is thought that impulse control disorders develop due to a combination of factors. These behaviors can occur with other mental health disorders such as anxiety and depression. Biological factors may play a role in the development of ICDs. Commonly, most people who suffer from impulse control disorder have distress or conflict associated with this behavior. Oppositional Defiant Disorder An individual who struggles with this disorder will show signs of being uncooperative, defiant, and at times, hostile toward people in authority. These individuals find it hard to comply with any form of authority and often blame others for their attitudes and behaviors. The most common symptoms of ODD are: Frequently in trouble at school Has a hard time making/keeping friends Frequent anger bursts/temper tantrums Irritable, argumentative, angry Does not comply [...]

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What Happens In a DBT Therapy Group? How It Can Help You?

What Happens In a DBT Therapy Group? How It Can Help You?

Miranda Otsuka, Kate Motaung2026-04-30T14:33:56+00:00April 30th, 2026|Featured, Group Counseling, Men’s Issues, Personal Development, Women’s Issues|

Do you tend to blow up easily toward the people closest to you? Do your emotions feel out of control and get in the way of you achieving your goals? Do you feel misunderstood and have trouble connecting with people? If so, this article may be for you. What Is DBT? DBT (dialectical behavior therapy) is a comprehensive, evidence-based treatment plan based on cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), that has been especially adapted for people who feel emotions intensely, see things as black or white, and struggle with mood swings, emotional instability, relationship issues, and impulsive behaviors. It is conducted through a combination of one-on-one therapy sessions and participation in group therapy sessions. Both are vital to the program's success, but the therapy group is where you learn the skills and practice them with your peers. The dialectical part of DBT focuses on balancing opposing forces and helping you detach from either-or thinking. It teaches you to acknowledge that two things that seem opposite or contradictory can both be true at the same time. You can, for instance, both accept your challenges and work toward changing them simultaneously. The ultimate goal of DBT is to help you understand and accept your difficult feelings while equipping you with effective coping skills to manage them and make the positive changes you desire in your life. The DBT Therapy Group A DBT therapy group generally consists of six to ten people who meet for one to two hours a week for six months to a year. The group is conducted like a class with a structured curriculum that you attend to learn specific skills such as mindfulness, emotion regulation, distress tolerance, and interpersonal effectiveness that serve as tools to help you manage difficult emotions, cope with stress, reduce self-destructive behaviors, and improve your [...]

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Is There Such a Thing as Religious OCD?

Is There Such a Thing as Religious OCD?

Miranda Otsuka, Kate Motaung2026-04-22T07:31:19+00:00April 8th, 2026|Featured, Individual Counseling, OCD, Spiritual Development|

Religious OCD is real. Also known as scrupulosity, it is a form of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder in which the scrupulous person is obsessed by intrusive thoughts. He or she believes they committed a sin or did or thought something blasphemous. This triggers feelings of intense fear and distress that drive him or her to behave in extreme, compulsive religious ways to try and get rid of the obsessions and silence the anxiety. I just want to know if I can go to Heaven. That’s all I want in life, salvation in the next. – Sarah Gracia Symptoms Of Religious OCD Symptoms of religious OCD include a combination of obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors. Obsessions Obsessions are typically centered around fear of angering God by committing a sin or blasphemy and being punished for it. Some common examples include: Fear of having committed a sin or done something blasphemous that you don’t remember doing, or may have done by mistake, not realizing you were doing it. Confusing feelings with facts, and seeing possible or imaginary sin where there is no sin. Irrational, intrusive thoughts of not being devout, moral, or faithful enough, despite all evidence to the contrary. Excessive concern over whether you are praying or performing the rites or observations of your religion correctly, and whether or not you are completely following God’s will in every area of your life. Sudden, intrusive blasphemous thoughts, such as sexual images about religious leaders, or urges to curse God or sell your soul to the devil. These thoughts pop into your mind even during prayer or worship, and trigger intense guilt and fear as you wonder if you really meant to have them. Constant fear of doing something wrong that would jeopardize your soul and cause you to lose your salvation and [...]

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Soul Care: Identity Formation

Soul Care: Identity Formation

Noah Cordrey, Kate Motaung2026-03-24T06:39:15+00:00March 24th, 2026|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues, Spiritual Development|

What makes up the foundation of your being? If you were to think of yourself as a house, the foundation of your house is underground and unseen. Similarly, your soul is the unseen foundation of your being and of who you are. Knowing what makes up the foundation of who you are is an essential part of becoming a healthy and integrated human being. A major part of your soul is your identity. Dr. Rob Reimer says, “What you believe about yourself is the foundation of your life; it is your identity, and a faulty foundation will create cracks in the soul. If you are going to construct a healthy life, it begins with what you believe about yourself.” What is your identity built upon? A way that you can begin to answer this question is to start examining what you believe about yourself. Not what you want other people to think or believe about you, but what do you think about yourself? Let’s take Dr. Reimer’s words into deeper consideration as we think about identity. Using his framework for understanding how the shaping of our souls informs the outworking of our identity, to properly comprehend our identity, we must first understand what our belief system is built upon. Each of us has an internal belief system. It has been formed, shaped, and molded over the course of our lives. This has likely happened through our various life experiences, including what we were taught about ourselves and about the world around us at a young age. We tend to expose our internal belief system in different ways. One common way we do this is through talking about ourselves and others. This internal data is not as hard to reach as people might think. It is constantly running in our [...]

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Common Signs of Gaslighting in a Relationship

Common Signs of Gaslighting in a Relationship

Kate Motaung2026-02-27T18:16:01+00:00February 27th, 2026|Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Gaslighting has existed for as long as human relationships have, but it’s only recently gotten significant public attention. Through pop culture and social media, the term, which is derived from a 1938 play titled “Gas Light,” has made its way into everyday conversation. In the story, a husband systematically manipulates his wife into questioning her own sanity. These days, the term describes emotional manipulation and abuse where the abuser, or gas lighter, uses mind games to control the victim, making them doubt their own perceptions, memories, and even their own grip on reality. If you’re in a relationship that often has you scratching your head and questioning your own memory and perceptions, you may be in a relationship where gaslighting is at play. You might also start to wonder about what is real or feel guilty about things you don’t quite understand. Gaslighters love to twist the truth to make you feel as if you’re to blame, even when you are innocent of their accusations. Here are some things to look for if you suspect you might be experiencing gaslighting in a relationship. Persistent self-doubt While self-doubt can be a sign of other issues in your life, such as low self-esteem, it can also be a sign of gaslighting. If you have noticed that you’re constantly questioning your own memories or perceptions, or if your partner is consistently dismissing your feelings or experiences, you may be a victim of gaslighting.Gas lighters often accuse their victims of “overreacting” or “being overly sensitive.” This consistent manipulation can cause the victim to second-guess their own authentic memories and perceptions of reality. Cognitive dissonance If you’re a victim of gaslighting, you may experience a sense of losing touch with reality. Your partner, or abuser, might insist that you said something that you never said [...]

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The Importance of Listening to Your Nervous System: A Christian Counselor Explains

The Importance of Listening to Your Nervous System: A Christian Counselor Explains

Noah Cordrey, Kate Motaung2026-02-02T14:26:21+00:00January 30th, 2026|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues|

Let’s do a quick mental exercise. Briefly recall the last time that you were in a mildly stressful situation. Maybe you were rushing out the door to your car because you were late for an appointment. Or perhaps you were anticipating having an important conversation with your boss, a friend, or a family member. Now, once you’ve got that mildly stressful situation in your mind, bring your attention to what’s happening in your body at that moment. What is your breathing pattern? What actions does your body want to take? What sensations do you experience in your body, and where do you feel them? Finally, what emotions come to the surface? All of these are signals that come from a deeper place in you: your nervous system. The Nervous System The human nervous system is a complex and intricate web of nerve cells that send and receive electrical and chemical signals all over our bodies. From our brain stems, through our torso, into our arms, down into our stomachs, and into our legs, it covers a lot of ground, and it is an essential part of us that God has made. The questions above aim to bring awareness to what our nervous system is telling us about what we are experiencing, even when we may be unaware of it. They slow us down by training our awareness and attention to rest on a specific part of our experience: breathing, action, sensation, and emotion. Living in the modern world causes a significant amount of stress or anxiety for many people. Between juggling work responsibilities, maintaining friendships, raising children, and making sure basic needs are met, our lives can become overwhelming and fast-paced. While God has graciously given us the ability to adapt to our circumstances and environments, many still find themselves [...]

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How to Identify and Relate to Autistic Behavior in a Loved One

How to Identify and Relate to Autistic Behavior in a Loved One

Meluleki Ncube, Kate Motaung2026-01-10T04:51:52+00:00January 12th, 2026|Autism spectrum disorder, Family Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

People are different in many ways, including their neurology. A neurodivergent person is atypical in how they experience and interact with their world. Just as in every other facet of life, the call to love our neighbors as we love ourselves (Matthew 22:37-40) includes those who are not neurotypical. We should approach neurodiverse individuals with the same compassion we want to receive for the ways we’re different. Autism – Understanding It and Dispelling Myths Autism is a condition formally referred to as Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). Though that is the clinical term, many prefer to refer to the condition as autism or simply as being autistic. The choice of language a person prefers will vary – the preference might be for person-first language (e.g., "person with autism") or for identity-first language (e.g., "autistic person"). Setting to one side what is appropriate when referring to ASD and individuals with ASD, the question is, what is ASD? ASD is a neurodevelopmental condition that manifests differently and uniquely in individuals. It influences how the individual interacts with and perceives the world around them. ASD is characterized by differences in behavioral patterns, social communication, and sensory experiences. ASD is commonly described as a spectrum. This is because the condition encompasses a broad range of challenges and abilities, and these exist on a spectrum. Two people with ASD won’t experience the same levels of difficulty with communication, social interactions, sensitivity to sensory input like light or sound, or in their experiences of repetitive behaviors. The spectrum nature of autism may also mean that some individuals excel in certain areas, such as their memory, art, or mathematics, while facing challenges in other areas of life, like maintaining relationships. Common Misunderstandings and Controversies about Autism We live in the information age, which has positive and negative implications. [...]

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10 Tips for Parenting Highly Sensitive Children

10 Tips for Parenting Highly Sensitive Children

Jane Zerabruk, Kate Motaung2025-12-17T06:29:41+00:00December 17th, 2025|Christian Counseling for Children, Christian Counseling For Teens, Family Counseling, Featured, Relationship Issues|

Highly sensitive children are those whose nervous systems process stimuli more deeply and intensely than the norm, making them supersensitive to their surroundings and easily overwhelmed by the sensations they experience. In her book, The Highly Sensitive Child, psychologist Elaine Aron depicts highly sensitive children as perceiving more, pondering more, and feeling more in every situation that they quickly reach their limits and the sensory overload becomes more than they can handle. Common Characteristics of Highly Sensitive Children Their brains never turn off. Highly sensitive children are acutely tuned in to everything and everyone in their surroundings, and tend to be extremely bright, intuitive, reflective, and insightful. They take in more sensory information from their environment than most other kids do, notice subtle details and nuances that are typically overlooked, process information more thoroughly, and often have an amazing memory and recall of details. They are easily overwhelmed by sensory stimuli. Highly sensitive children have a more reactive nervous system than the norm, which causes them to experience noise, light, smells, tastes, and textures more intensely than other children do. They have a heightened awareness of subtle details, such as faint sounds, barely perceptible smells, and slight changes in temperature or visual clues that other kids often ignore, which can lead to becoming overstimulated and overwhelmed by these sensations. They are deeply empathetic. Highly sensitive children can empathize deeply with the emotions of others, pick up on subtle cues in interpersonal dynamics, and are quick to comfort or offer help. They have an intense need to be in control. Highly sensitive children have a strong sense of caution and consequences, and try to diminish risks by overthinking potential outcomes. They find comfort in predictability, which may lead them to be rigid, inflexible, and resistant to anything new. In an [...]

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4 Ways to Forgive Others

4 Ways to Forgive Others

Meluleki Ncube, Kate Motaung2025-12-02T08:44:11+00:00December 2nd, 2025|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues, Spiritual Development|

Forgiveness is a biblical mandate. However, people don’t always understand that forgiveness is easier said than done. It’s silly to believe that it is simple for someone to forgive a person who has committed a heinous crime against them, such as sexual assault or molestation. Yet, forgiveness not only sets the victim free, but it also sets the offender free. Forgiveness is the key to emotional and spiritual freedom. But how does a person do that? Forgiveness can take time Forgiveness is a process. Jesus tells His disciples they should forgive others seventy times seven. This indicates that they may have to forgive others more than once. Lisa Teurkeurst, in her book Forgiving What You Can’t Forget, identifies forgiveness as a process. She validates the reader’s feelings and understands that the feelings associated with the offense are not easily eradicated. In the book, she gives a practical strategy she learned from her own counselor. This counselor told her to say the following statement: “I choose to forgive__________ for ___________ and what my feelings can’t catch up to, I pray the blood of Christ will cover.” Participating in this process of forgiveness will help people, both those who are struggling to forgive as well as the offender. We need to understand that forgiveness takes time. As a society, people often struggle to grieve or deal with loss well. They may skip grief completely and stuff their feelings in the hopes that somehow those feelings will go away on their own. However, deep emotions like sadness, anger, resentment, and others are eventually unearthed elsewhere. It just depends on the situation and the person. Understanding forgiveness and considering the nature of the offense will help to initiate forgiveness. By participating in the above exercise, some will be able to move toward wholeness [...]

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The Importance of Measuring Your Level of Death Anxiety

The Importance of Measuring Your Level of Death Anxiety

Grace Mavindidze2025-12-02T07:58:29+00:00November 29th, 2025|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Everyone’s a little bit wary of the Grim Reaper, and it’s quite natural to have some level of concern about dying. But the moment such thoughts start to take over normal daily functioning, it becomes a sign of a serious problem, like death anxiety. It is not normal to be thinking about dying all the time to the extent that it disrupts your daily activities like working or hanging out with others; this only reduces your quality of life. Death anxiety is also known as death phobia or the more technical term, thanatophobia; a strong and excessive fear or irrational awareness regarding one’s death, the dying process, the afterlife, and even events that surround the death of loved ones. Do you know that methods are now available where you can measure how unhealthy your fears of death are? Knowing your level of death anxiety, or that of a loved one, is an important preparatory stage for addressing and managing such crippling fears, and whether you need any help. One widely used method is called the Death Anxiety Scale, or DAS. How the Death Anxiety Scale works This approach was originally developed in the 1970s by American psychologist Donald Templer, and it has since proved to be a valuable tool in clinical and research applications. DAS, in brief, is a collection of 15 statements measuring different facets of anxiety related to dying, such as anxiety about the unknown, anxiety about the dying process, and anxiety about separation from those you love. The statements below are some examples: I am terrified to die The thought of death frequently enters my mind It makes me nervous when I hear people talking about death I am afraid to be operated on I am terrified of getting cancer The thought of death frequently worries me [...]

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