Miranda Otsuka

Grief is an intense, messy, overwhelming experience for everyone, regardless of how many times you have gone through it. Over the decades, people have developed and expanded on the idea of grieving stages. If grief is a journey through the wilderness to an unseen location called Acceptance, then the grieving stages are the guidebook of what to expect on the journey. During grief, you will encounter unpredictable emotions and surprising reactions. At some point, you will become stuck in depression or some other powerful emotion. As long as you know that what you are going through is normal, you will have less to worry about and a little more to look forward to. The stages you walk through during grief are not linear. They are not the same for everyone, and they do not account for how confusing grief can be. The grieving stages also apply to types of grief besides bereavement. They highlight that your experience is valid, even when no one else understands. The grieving stages are sometimes taught or explained in a way that makes grief seem oversimplified or confusing, especially when someone does not experience one of the outlined stages. They are a loose framework against which you can compare your experience and understand something about yourself. The stages are not a rigid step-by-step program that everyone must complete and do so in the same way. The grieving stages have always been about approaching death and loss with dignity and compassion, and not feeling alone as you try to deal with your thoughts and emotions. The Updated Grieving Stages Until recently, we have collectively talked about grief happening in five stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Swiss-born psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross originally provided this framework in her 1969 book On Death and Dying. After working [...]

Listen to this article https://greenlakecounseling.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/Greenlake-Christian-Counseling-Finding-Support-When-Grieving-the-Loss-of-a-Parent-1.mp3   The loss of a parent is never easy, no matter what your age. Even if the loss was expected, it’s a finality that nothing can prepare you for. The parent-child bond is one of the most fundamental human connections. Whether your relationship with your parent was close or difficult, you are still always your parent’s child, and he or she will always be a reference point for how you define your sense of self. When the bond is broken through your parent’s death, it can be a profoundly life-altering experience that impacts your life in many unpredictable ways. Your family dynamics are irrevocably changed, and so are you, as you realize you are now the older generation and ponder your mortality. Common Emotions Following the Loss of a Parent You may feel flooded by a multitude of tangled emotions ranging from anguish, fear, abandonment, emptiness, and disbelief to numbness, loneliness, sorrow, and heartache over the things you will miss out on going forward. Even if you were estranged from your parent or your relationship was a rocky one, losing him or her can still bring up powerful feelings such as anger, guilt, remorse, relief, and frustration over issues that can no longer be resolved. Some of the most commonly felt emotions include: Sadness Tears may lie close to the surface and be easily triggered by something you see or smell that brings back a memory of your parent, or when, for instance, you reach for the phone to share something with him or her and remember he or she is no longer there. Anger You may feel angry with your parent for leaving you, with God for allowing it to happen, or even with yourself for not doing something you think you [...]